Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Sugar Ray - Lemonade And Brownies



When I was younger, I had a tendency to buy albums from bands I had never had heard just because it had a cool album cover. And by cool album cover, I mean it had a hot chick on it. And thus, Sugar Ray’s Lemonade and Brownies came into my life.

Their next album had “Fly,” which made them megastars. Strangely, I got instant credibility for having listened to Sugar Ray before they became popular. Yes, kids, listening to Sugar Ray gave me cred points. The 90s were a weird time.

If you know Sugar Ray from their singles, then you probably don’t know that they originally started as a bad funk metal band. Hell, I kind of forgot myself. But “Rhyme Stealer” quickly reminds me of that. Emphasis on the bad. It reminds me of those tracks towards the end of the early Chili Peppers albums that were clearly there just to pad out the running time.

“Iron Mic” is about how Mike Tyson needs to be released from prison. I think Tyson might have already been released by the time this came out. I once saw Sugar Ray live (it was a free show) and Tyson had definitely already been freed, yet they performed this song, free of irony.

If I didn’t think it could get worse, Mark McGrath busts into falsetto on “Hold Your Eyes.” If they were a little bit more famous, maybe someone would’ve told him no. Instead, everyone probably just shrugged their shoulders and said, “It’s not like anyone’s going to listen to this.”

Did you know that’s Nicole Eggert on the album cover? I’ve always wondered what exactly her level of fame is. I mean, sometimes I think she’s pretty famous. Other times, I think very few people know who she actually is. Hell, I even had to go to Wikipedia to figure out what she was famous for. Oh, I forgot she was on Charles In Charge. She owns an ice cream truck now. So, at the time of Lemonade and Brownies, her level of fame was somewhere below a sitcom actress and above an ice cream truck driver.

“Mean Machine” actually ain’t too bad. Though it’s better with Beavis and Butthead on commentary.





“Dance Party USA” is probably the height of their lyrical prowess: “I’m like the Real World, first I was in New York, then LA, now Frisco.” I dread how long the song would be if they included every subsequent season. If I have to give praise to this album, it’s that I’ll most likely forget it in an hour.

“Danzig Needs A Hug” is an awesome title that a good band could’ve turned into an awesome song. Alas, instead we get an attempt at a slow funk jam. Then “Drive By” is a horrible skit about how it’s impossible to understand the guy at the drive-thru… You know what? I quit. No funny joke to end this on. I just can’t. I’ve wasted enough of my life as it is.

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