Goo Goo Dolls - "Hold Me Up"

HYPOTHETICAL: Let’s say you were in a band that rocked (moderately) and have been toiling away in obscurity for years. Then one day, you wake up and have a surprise hit with a crappy ballad. Do you now go back to rocking (moderately) or do you decide to make a career of crappy ballads?

We all know which direction Buffalo’s favorite sons, the Goo Goo Dolls, went. But before they were adult contemporary crooners, they were a Replacements rip-off. I got into them before they got famous, because I’m cool. That’s what makes you cool, kids. Getting into bands before they’re famous.

Actually, I got into them because they had three (3!) songs on the Freddy’s Dead soundtrack. Then I found out they were from Buffalo. So I had to get their CD because I thought that was how to support local music.

SIDE NOTE: How the hell did they get signed to Metal Blade Records???

FUN TRIVIA: Hold Me Up was produced by Armand John Petri, who also produced Milf’s Ha-Ha Bus, a much better album by a much better Buffalo band. I met Armand while I was working at Record Theatre. He told me that he passed on a chance to produce Metallica’s Kill ‘Em All because he didn’t think they were very good. But he did become Sixpence None The Richer’s manager because he thought they were destined for greatness. Also, he was best friends with Rainbow’s bassist’s cousin, or something like that.

Okay, I lied. That wasn’t fun at all. I knew that, but I went ahead and told it anyway. I apologize.

Right off the bat, it’s hard to believe this is the same band that gave us “Name” and “Iris” and all those other songs your mom likes. I remember a review of “Name” that said Johnny earnestly bares his soul open. Well, he does the same here on “Just The Way You Are” but without the melodrama and with a better melody and a rocking riff. This should’ve been the Goos’ breakout song. Their artistic development probably would’ve gone on a better trajectory had it been.

There’s a downright awesome cover of Prince’s “Never Take The Place Of Your Man” with the late Lance Diamond on vocals. There used to be a law that every resident of Buffalo had to go see Lance Diamond’s weekly live show at least once in their life. What, there wasn’t such a law? There should’ve been. Man, that guy was an awesome performer.

Robbie sings about half the songs here, giving the punk ying to Johnny’s pop yang, ensuring a good balance for the album. I think this was the turning point, as Robbie sang the great majority of the first two albums. And it wouldn’t be long before Johnny dominated. Which wouldn’t be a problem if he were still writing good songs.

“Two Days In February,” another should’ve-been-hit, perfectly illustrates the problem with the Goos’ supposed maturation. The version here is simple, bare bones and was even recorded outside. The stripped down feel lets you see just how beautiful of a song it is. After making it big, they re-recorded the song and turned it into an overpolished mess that surely ruined many a prom.